Your Kingdom Come

So many of us have been able to recite The Lord's Prayer since we were young, which often leaves us shallow in our praying of it.  As I have reflected on the past days, three particular words are hitting me..."Your kingdom come..."  Too often I think we relegate this "request" to a future time, when the fullness of His kingdom will come.

But I believe it is for now too.  In fact, I believe that in our inviting His kingdom to come, we are asking the Divine to step into our lives...into this world in tangible ways.

I have been experiencing this in some very beautiful, purposeful ways.

My emotional health continues to wreak havoc with me.  It's not a constant, but certainly prominent, and some days or parts of days have taken me to dark places that I have not been in a while.  And sometimes in those places...God's peace is non-existent and His...I-am-with-you-always-Presence has disappeared.

Am I "allowed" to say that?!  I mean...aren't we supposed to know peace if we are following Him?  Have I failed or has God failed?  Or what if neither of us has failed?  What if this is just part of the mystery of humanity and divinity?

Regardless...His "hiding" is very real for me at times.  And oh so lonely and battle-weary hard.  Because I fight to have Him near me.

Yet...His kingdom comes.

"Your kingdom come..."  Recently I spent time with a beautifully courageous woman.  Our time together, though brief and simple, was rich.  Times of silence mixed with purposeful words from each of us marked our encounter.  It was all that was needed--I know her story and she knows mine and despite the differences, we are united by a faith we cling to no matter what.  She brings Him to me in ways that touch my hurting places.

"Your kingdom come..."  My friend-who-sticks-closer-than-a-brother is ever patient, offering gentle truth to me in my days of struggle.  I  relish those times when she listens to my raw emotional words and thoughts spoken only to a few.  Deep, intent listening are such a beautiful quality in my spiritual friend.  Her almost daily moments of checking in with me as I walk whatever path is before me is part of my life-line to Him.

"Your kingdom come..."  Yesterday a friend with a battered soul herself stopped in at a God-appointed time.  It was her day to be strong and to hold me and pray with me through my tears.  God truly guides our footsteps.

"Your kingdom come..."  For years now, he has been "God-with-skin-on" to me.  Sometimes it is his smile that says, "I adore you" when I'm in one of my non-coping moments, or his ever-listening ear, or his constant encouraging words; he is my life-long gift.

"Your kingdom come..."  She walked into my bedroom last night upon arriving home...just to say "Hi Mom...how are you?"  And with the tears pooling in my eyes, she smiled her compassion and wrapped her arms around me and just loved her Mama.

"Your kingdom come..."  I sat in the office of my Spiritual Director today and unburdened my soul...piece by piece.  All of my sadness and wondering and condemning thoughts and struggle and fear induced questions...all of this met with compassion and grace.  It was a place where I could be needy...where I didn't have to guard an image...where it was very much okay not to be strong and together.  I so needed this haven.

"Your kingdom come..."  Tomorrow I'm sharing a lunch hour with my crazy friend.  Oh she's very much sane, and certainly not without her own wounds, but she makes me laugh...a lot.  She's ultra carefree and shockingly outspoken and wildly authentic.  And I just know that for at least 60 minutes tomorrow, she will take my mind off of all that's not right in my world right now.

"Your kingdom come..."  

Because the divine is so purposefully building His kingdom here...amidst all of our brokenness, I can be assured that I will continue to feel His arms around me, His hand in mine, His words of comfort and truth and compassion...His feet never far from my doorstep...His tenderness in the eyes of someone who is being Jesus to me.

"Your kingdom come..."